Archive for the 'Addiction' Category


I had the monkey on for too long

Friday, July 27th, 2007

 If drug rehab saved me it can save anybody. That’s the whole truth and nothing but the truth. I had a monkey on my back for more years than I’d like to admit and it definitely had it’s grimy little hooks in me. You can ask anybody I know. I was a bonafide wack job for years on end and nothing seemed like it could pull me out of the grave. I was two or three hits away from taking a dirt nap and it almost felt like I was leading the charge to make it happen. I’ll be real, I wanted to cash in my chips and check out. I honestly felt like death would have been the only effective way to end my tormented way of life. That’s when drug treatment changed everything.

Once my mom and my step dad got a hold of me, they sent me right to the best addiction treatment center they could find. I fought it at first, but things started to take shape after I was used to being there. Withdrawal sucks ass, my friends. That’s for sure. But you’ve got to take it all in stride and continue telling yourself that it’s for the best. And actually, it is. I just looked at it like instant physical karma that you’re paying back to everyone that you’ve hurt while addicted. It didn’t help me when I was going through it but it’s definitely going to help me never go back.

Needles & back alleys-the sort of godawful degradation

Tuesday, June 26th, 2007

People think of heroin addicts and they imagine the worst, the most degenerate, of all possible worlds: needles and back alleys and the sort of godawful degradation that makes for the stuff of Hollywood movies and PBS documentaries. But that’s not always how it is. That’s not how it was for me, anyway.

 

I was a heroin addict for six years, and not once during that time did I end up face down in a pile of my own excrement. In fact, I was a heroin addict for six years and I managed to keep my job, and most of my friends, and to convince just about everyone who knew him that I was still a nice, normal guy.

 

Of course, I was slowly getting hollowed out from the inside. And heroin addiction treatment is the only thing that saved me.

 

The point here is that the fact you’re not at rock bottom doesn’t mean you don’t need help. There is no such thing as safe heroin use. More importantly, there is no such thing as edifying heroin use. If you’re a heroin abuser, your life can be better than it is. Period. Don’t wait another day to find that out for yourself.

Cocaine

Friday, June 1st, 2007

 The best thing about cocaine? That first high. You know what I’m talking about, if you’ve ever been there: that first rush after the first snort, when you have no idea what’s coming and man it just hits you, and leaves you sitting there blown out of your mind and feeling so good that it’s like oh my GOD I never want to feel any other for the rest of my whole entire life.

Too bad it don’t last.

The problem with that first cocaine high is that it wears off…and once it’s gone you can’t ever get it back: not like it was, not like that first time. The problem with cocaine is that every high after the first one is a letdown…and yeah you use more and more but still you feel less and less…until it’s all using and no feeling and then it’s just you getting eaten from the inside, by a need that is so far out of your control you can’t ever be anything but hopeless.

So, yeah: There’s an upside to cocaine. And there’s a downside too. Which is the one that haunts you down the road? Figure it out for yourself.

 

Crills. Rock. Crack.

Friday, March 30th, 2007

By any name, the ready-made form of freebase cocaine poses an
enormous problem in the United States. Indeed, crack is nothing less than a
full-fledged social scourge; it ruins physical and emotional health,
drives individuals into the hopeless depths of addiction, destroys those
families who have the misfortune of being infected by its use. Even
worse, the drug is only dimly understood by large segments of the country’s
population. In the 1980s, the War on Drugs made crack a household
word—but it was used by most people in a superficial way, as a sort of
stereotyped catch-all for addictive substances in general. The solution to
America’s crack problem—like the solution to the crack problems of
individual addicts—has to start with a sound and meaningful knowledge of the
drug itself.

First, some statistics. The 2004 National Survey on Drug Use and
Health (NSDUH) found that 7.8 million American have tried crack. Of that
number, one-sixth—1.3 million—had used crack in the last year, and
almost half a million respondents reported ongoing crack abuse. Those numbers were higher than the figures from prior
surveys, indicating that the nation’s crack habit—once believed to be
under control—may be gathering strength.

More troubling still were the data for teenage crack users. A 2005
Monitoring the Future (MTF) study found that 2.4 percent of all
eighth-grade students had tried crack at some point in their lives. 1.4 percent
had used the drug the last year. The rate was even higher for twelfth
graders: 3.5 percent had used crack at least once, and 1.9 had done so
in the previous twelve months. If those numbers are any indication,
America’s chances for a crack-free future seem very slim indeed.

But what exactly is all the fuss about? What is crack, and what
makes it so bad? More to the point: Why should Americans—all Americans—be
concerned about it? It’s one thing to talk about crack being a problem;
it’s quite another thing to know why it’s a problem—and to be able to
use that knowledge to fight back against the drug itself. All too often,
the knowing—or the lack of it—can make the difference between life and
death.

Crack is, in clinical terms, the unneutralized base form of
powdered—hydrochloric—cocaine. Crack typically comes in tiny crystallized
pellets, or “rocks,” which can be smoked without further chemical
alteration. Smoking crack is different from “free-basing cocaine” in that there’s
less work involved on the part of the user; crack pellets are
essentially prefabricated freebase, meaning that crack users can get the
benefits of freebase without going through the intricate pains of producing
it.

And what of those “benefits”? The first part of crack’s noxiousness
lies in the extraordinarily addictive character of the drug. A crack
high is one of the most overwhelming feelings in the world; users compare
into a hyperpotent sexual orgasm combined with a hyperenergized state
of euphoria. Unfortunately, the high only lasts for a few minutes, and
is followed by a prolonged sensation of restless irritability. That
irritability, coupled with the rush of the high itself, compels crack users
into cycles of habitual abuse. Crack, in other words, will make an
addict out of anyone.

But addictiveness doesn’t tell the whole story. Crack is also
problematic because of its ease of use and affordability. As noted above,
crack is simple to use; there’s no complex set-up involved, no painstaking
prep work to be done—all you have to do is smoke it. More to the point,
crack is relatively cheap—certainly cheaper than powdered cocaine.
Crack is attractive to many potential users simply because they can afford
it, a fact that has contributed to the drug’s bustling street trade.
Not only is crack extremely addictive, then—it’s also easy to get. By any
standard, that’s a recipe for disaster.

And then, of course, there are the side effects. After all,
addictiveness and availability aren’t problematic in and of themselves; they’re
troubling because they encourage crack use, and crack use is an
exceedingly bad thing. Like all forms of cocaine, crack is a stimulant. It
works by blocking the reuptake of dopamine molecules in the brain, thereby
enhancing the function of the nervous system. Physical complications
associated with crack use include heart attacks, arrhythmia, strokes,
seizures, and respiratory failure. Crack can also cause gastrointestinal
pain and loss of appetite, resulting in malnourishment in chronic users.
Psychologically, prolonged crack abuse can produce irritability,
paranoia, and full-blown psychosis. To put it simply: Crack kills. Whatever
it’s pushing, you very certainly don’t want it.

Which of course has got to be the starting point for any sort of
crack recovery, either on a national or individual scale: We—all of
us—need to understand exactly what we’re up against. Tellingly, the 2005 MTF
survey cited above found that only 60.8 percent of American twelfth
graders believed that occasional crack use was a harmful pastime. 60.8
percent. That means that forty percent—almost half—of all American
eighteen-year-olds think crack isn’t so bad. Obviously, they don’t get it—and
unfortunately, they’re not alone. Until we—all of us—develop a thorough
and sober vision of what crack is, and what crack does, we don’t have
much of a chance in the fight against it. Recovery—healing—has to start
with awareness.

And awareness has to start with you.

(Source: http://www.nida.nih.gov/Infofacts/cocaine.html; Cocaine: A
Clinician’s Handbook, by Arnold M. Washton and Mark S. Gold